


Sixteen Going On Seventeen

by DidiNyx



Series: 2018 Lams Fics [8]
Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Alex doesn't understand emotions, Alternate Universe - High School, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Theatre, Anxiety, Cute Ending, Dialogue Heavy, Feminization (kind of?), First Kiss, Flirting, Hurt/Comfort, Literary References & Allusions, M/M, Mutual Pining, Performance Art, Self-Acceptance, Self-Doubt, Slow Dancing, Voice Kink, cliche/happy ending
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-08
Updated: 2018-08-08
Packaged: 2019-06-16 21:26:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,052
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15446202
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DidiNyx/pseuds/DidiNyx
Summary: "What if... this part just isn't for me?"After a brief pause, John let out an exhale. "I think you just summed up my life."Alex smiled. "We're meant to be."John chuckled. "Indeed." He met Alex's eyes, expression soft and fond. "Alex, we all believe in you. I believe in you. I think this part was specially made for you."Alex blushed suddenly. "How come?"





	Sixteen Going On Seventeen

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Shelly Orlova](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=Shelly+Orlova).



> i fucking hate performance anxiety and i have choir again this year
> 
> *whispers* i can't dance so if the descriptions are messy sorry
> 
> THIS IS TO MY FRIEND SHELLY who always supports me with my writing <3 ily

You’d think with all the teens in law, business, or other sophisticated majors at King, barely any of them would have the time nor intent to be part of theatre. Of course, if you agree, you’d be wrong.

“No, no, I don’t think that’s the right key,” Peggy said, frowning ever so slightly.

Alex smirked as he prepared for John’s protest.

John raised an eyebrow, questioning. “No? Sounds right to me. Isn’t that what Angelica was playing, not too long ago?”

“I believe it was,” Alex backed up, amused. Maybe if it was anyone else to defend, he wouldn’t have nearly cared as much and let Peggy sass the poor soul around. Besides, as someone with the same pride and honor-obsession as John, he understood where his friend was coming from.

Peggy rolled her eyes. “Sometimes I think you should’ve just stuck with piano,” she said, addressing John with a teasing smirk. She was truly one to talk. Her sisters Angelica and Eliza practically forced her to join theatre, and finding her own voice without the shadow of Angelica the Queen and sweet, pure Eliza’s shadow was challenge enough- greater than a simple test of how well you can listen and copy the music.

John shoved her playfully. “Please, I can sing, Margarita .” He stretched out Peggy’s real name just to irritate her, and she immediately flushed. “There’s a reason why Angelica selected me to be here. It wasn’t just luck. This was her key.”

“Well, you’re not here to be Angelica. You’re to be you, and I personally think it should be sung differently.” Peggy turned to Alex, expression hopeful. “Back me up on this.”

Alex grinned, seeking his opportunity. “I think John’s voice was as lovely as always,” he said, flashing John a smile and a wink.

John blushed, but sighed. He turned back to Peggy after giving Alex a halfhearted glare. “Okay, how about-”

“Okay people!” Angelica’s voice echoed across the theatre class’s walls. “We need all performers in the center of the room. Meeting time.” She clapped her hands together eagerly. While she looked excited, everyone else looked nervous. Angelica could be intense when she wanted to be. At least it put a halt in John and Peggy’s sibling-like arguing.

The group made a circle surrounding Angelica and Aaron, who’d originally planned their drama committee. Angelica proudly strutted a simple white tank and pink skirt, black, frizzy hair up in a bun as usual when she was busy rehearsing. Compared to her, Aaron looked too formal and overdressed with his suit and dress slacks. Most of the other kids just wore their usual T-shirts and jeans… maybe unless you were Alex, who barely had any wardrobe to begin with.

“We are all aware that Emmy chose ‘Seasons of Love’ to be our finale, correct?”

Alex glanced at John, who looked at his childhood best friend Martha in praise as he and the rest of the participants all mumbled in agreement.

Martha smiled, cheerfully waving. “It’s my favorite song,” she explained. She was already so bright with her platinum blonde hair and white clothing, the smile made her look even more blinding. “ Rent is one of my favorite musicals anyway.”

“Beautiful choice,” Eliza spoke up, flipping her dark braid behind her shoulder. “It really captures the relationship we’ve grown here together after these years, plus it’s a Broadway classic.” Leave it to Eliza to be the optimist. Alex adored that. Without these people… Hell, he wouldn’t have a family.

Angelica smiled appreciatively at her sister. “Right. Well said. We’re still working out who’ll be singing which part, but obviously, Emmy and MJ will have the two main female parts. We need volunteers for the guys, if any?” Her dark eyes scanned the crowd expectedly.

John raised his hand, along with Aaron, Frederick, and Thomas. The rest nodded like Sure, why not? as Alex shifted uncomfortably, waiting for someone to accuse him.

“Great. Aaron and I will be holding auditions later in the week.” She tapped her clipboard. “Reminder that if you already have two leading songs you won’t be able to contribute to the main parts in our finale. We need room for everyone.”

Aaron nodded in agreement. “Also, there are a few of you who need to make decisions on your songs.”

“Oh yes,” Angelica flipped a page in her clipboard. “If I call your name, stay here so we can sort that out.”

“James, Sarah, Maria,” Aaron called.

“Peggy, Sam, and Alex,” Angelica read.

Alex winced, expecting that. John shot a curious look at Alex, who’d glanced at John too at the same moment.

Alex shrugged. It’s complicated, he mouthed.

John smiled and gave him an encouraging thumbs up and a smile.

Alex quickly looked away, trying to hide his blush.

“...and Thomas. That is all. Thank you!” Angelica finished up.

John stayed, still eyeing Alex as everyone else stepped closer to Angelica, awaiting her judgment. “You don’t have enough parts?” he asked gently, more curious than anything as he walked closer to his friend.

Alex shrugged, still blushing. “I, uh, considered some. But… none really caught my attention.”

“No? Not even a little?” John tilted his head.

“Unfortunately, no.” Alex managed a smile. “You know me, always Eminem but never John Legend.”

John rolled his eyes. “Sophisticated comparison,” he muttered, elbowing Alex teasingly.

“ _Merci_ , Jack,” came Alex’s own sly remark.

"Mm.  You know, I was wondering..." John's eyes darted to the ceiling as if contemplating. "There's actually a duet I was given- it was recommended by Angelica, of course- but I still need a partner." A cheerful light returned to his eyes as he looked back down at Alex, a shy smile on his face. "You want to join me?"

Alex's own eyes darted across John's face, a slow but steady smile on his own lips. "Really?"

"Yes," John gushed, sticking his hands in his pockets.

"Hmm." Alex smirked, holding out his hand. "Of course, John."

John took his hand and squeezed it appreciatively. "Great. Let's inform Angelica."

Alex merrily made his way over to Angelica, almost skipping with delight. John's voice- along with everything else about him- was so beautiful. He felt honored to be part of a duet with him. Besides, they were best friends since...well, since what felt like forever. Their bond would make any song special, Alex was sure. Putting their love on display for everyone to see also made Alex quite giddy, too.

Damn. John made Alex such a sap.

Angelica smiled when she saw John. "Hey! How's the duet going? Are the lower notes as easy as they were the first time we rehearsed?"

John chuckled. He was known for being the few tenors that could reach high notes with graceful ease- so much that he first needed a review to properly sing the bass part. "Yep. Speaking of which..." John eyed Alex proudly. "Alex wants to be part of the duet."

Angelica's eyes shone with delight. "Really? Alex, I didn't think you'd be interested."

Alex shouldn't have felt embarrassed, yet he did. Hoping his blush wasn't noticeable, he said, "Yeah, well, I'm trying to expand my talent. Plus, John makes everything much more fun."

John beamed, and Angelica nodded. "Great. John and Alexander, 'Sixteen Going On Seventeen'-"

Alex nearly choked. "Wait... _that's_ our song?"

Angelica frowned, pen hovering just above her clipboard. "John didn't say?"

John nervously tucked a strand of curly hair behind his ear. "Um, I was going to, but..."

Alex shrugged, trying to look calm. "It's fine."

"Alex..." John said gently. "There- there are dance parts, and dialogue, so if you don't want to do it, I won't force you..."

Alex shook his head. No. He was always up for a challenge. Sure, he didn't see himself as talented as most people here, but he'd be damned if anyone else had to do such an intimate performance with John. Alex inwardly blinked at himself, confused. Wait, was that his true motives? Was he actually being protective? God, he was so petty sometimes...

"No. I want to do it."

Angelica nodded, scribbling down something on her paper. "Great. You don't necessarily have to audition, but sometime today I want to check up on you and give you any pointers, if they're needed." Her focus returned to John. "Good luck, you two. John, you are his coach for now. Make sure you both practice. This show is in a few weeks and we're still figuring out all the kinks. Thanks."

She turned away and walked towards Peggy's direction, mumbling something about how the design she chose didn't match the attire, or whatever.

The boys turned to each other, smiling. John spoke up: "Welp, what are we waiting for? Let's go." He grabbed Alex's hand (which sped up the latter's heart rate by a pretty fair amount, he could admit) and steered him to the opposite side of the room. "I'm so excited to show you the choreography MJ helped pick out- and the props are really cool, too. I think the song is quite fitting for both our vocal ranges, but..."

* * *

 It's not that he had performance anxiety per se. But suddenly nerves took over Alex as the bright lights of the theatre shone in his face, everyone's eyes on him expectedly.

"Alex?" Angelica asked, concern creeping into her voice.

Alex cleared his throat and smiled apologetically, almost wincing. "Sorry, that higher note tripped me up." He smiled as if it was all a joke. "I'll get back to you on that."

Angelica nodded, almost unconvinced, but said "Alright. Next up: Maria and your part of 'Cell Block Tango' unless you went with 'Popular' after all..."

Alex quickly turned away, cursing under his breath. He usually did okay in front of people- no, that was an understatement. He was the unofficial captain of the debate team. He could rant for hours with his friends about the most simple, pettiest things and feel no remorse. Hell, when rap numbers were on the list of songs they'd rehearse Alex signed up for them with no hesitation, and his delivery was always on point. But when it came to singing... that was more intimate, personal. And a lot scarier.

Alex made his way over to John, beginning to play the piano in front of him. "Hey," he said, smiling. He handed Alex his water bottle. "You okay? It's just your voice acting up, right?"

Alex grateful swallowed nearly half the water bottle. "Yeah, totally." Alex shrugged. "I guess that's what I get for having such a rough voice."

"It has character. That's why people love it."

Alex snorted. "Right," he replied bitterly.

John frowned, confused, but didn't press on. "Angelica would be fine if you just sang the beginning in the range you're comfortable with. Starting those high notes right off the bat with no proper warm up was bound to cause a mistake."

Alex nodded, considering this. "I know. I just... thought I'd try."

"We can do it again. All you need is practice. It's actually an easy song."

Alex's usual smirk came back. "You mean before all the dance numbers were added in?"

John blushed. "Well, I can teach you that too. Ever slow danced?"

"Pfft. Does it look like it?"

"Nah, but you have to learn for this song." John copied Alex's wink and smirk from earlier, and Alex rolled his eyes fondly.

"At least I have the best teacher."

"Mm? You think so?"

"I know so. I didn't choose our best male tenor for nothing."

"I would not say best."

"I would."

John shook his head, smile refusing to leave. "How am I going to be able to teach a stubborn redhead like you?"

"You'll figure it out,” Alex promised, confident. “You always do.”

* * *

 It had been about five minutes and Alex was still shaking with laughter.

John turned bright red. "We can change the pronouns."

"I know," Alex said breathlessly, wiping a single tear from his cheek. "Sorry, that was just- oh my gosh. A classic."

John rolled his eyes. "You can be very childish, Alexander."

"So I've been told." Alex leaned back on John's bed, content. "Proceed," he said, mocking a formal tone just to annoy John.

The boy took a deep breath and sang: " _You wait, little boy_ -"

"Yes, that's better," Alex said with a chuckle. Hopefully, humor hid the fact that John saying the original words "little girl" sort of turned Alex on. (Which was stupid, he thought, but God John's voice was so hot.)

"- _on an empty stage, for fate to turn the light on_..."

"Slay, Jacky," Alex said with a salute.

John chose to ignore him. " _Your life, little girl_ -"

"Boy."

"Sure- _is an empty page, that men would want to write on_."

"To write on!"

"Alex, you have to sing it," John said with a chuckle.

" _To write on_."

"Better." John tried to pat Alex's head, but the other boy turned away.

"I know I should be taking this seriously-"

"Very," John agreed.

"-but I don't know..." Suddenly Alex looked down, contemplating.

John frowned. "Is it- is it just awkward? Since, you know, the original characters-"

"No, no," Alex reassured. "I don't care about the storyline, or whatever. Just singing. In front of... everyone." Alex met John's confused expression and continued: "I mean, obviously that's the point. I just... I don't know." Alex shrugged. "I didn't think I'd take theatre seriously. But now I'm here and I just- I don't want to let anyone down."

"Alex..."

"No, I mean it." Alex frowned. Since when did he feel this way? "What if... this part just isn't for me?"

After a brief pause, John let out an exhale. "I think you just summed up my life."

Alex smiled. "We're meant to be."

John chuckled. "Indeed." He met Alex's eyes, expression soft and fond. "Alex, we all believe in you. I believe in you. I think this part was specially made for you."

Alex blushed suddenly. "How come?"

"Well..." John's eyes had a faraway look in them. "My whole life I've been just... running. Hiding. Doing things that others enjoyed, all so I could meet up to their expectations on what they think I should be. But along the journey, I discovered what I was passionate about. Music is one of them. And..."

Alex held his breath.

"Like you said, we're meant to be. We're a team. We're sharing our problems and passions. This... this is one of them." He smiled awkwardly. "I didn't mean to sound so sappy, but, uh, that's how I feel."

Alex beamed.

"Besides, you're clearly talented. We are so perfect for this role."

"Hmm," Alex hummed thoughtfully. "That sounds about right."

"Besides," John said, regaining composure. "This song is one of self-discovery. Isn't that what we're experiencing right now?"

"Rolf and Liesl are set up to be a team in this song, like us. Except aren't you telling me what to do?"

John rolled his eyes and pulled Alex's arm so that he was sitting up. "I am older, after all."

"Ha, ha," Alex said, smirking. "Okay, okay, now that's out of the way..." Alex winced. "There's one more thing."

"Yes?" John's expression softened once more.

"I've- well, I've come to the conclusion that, under pressure and surrounded by an audience, it's much more harder for me to, well, perform."

"You get nervous?"

"You're lucky that around you my wall of hubris shatters," Alex muttered. "Yes, I get nervous. Eager to prove myself."

"I feel like we all want to prove something." John smiled. "It took me awhile to get used to it, too. Just know that we're all here to support you, and that your voice is beautiful. You won't be alone on that stage. I'll be there every step of the way."

"Thank you, John." He meant it. God, he was lucky. "And... you say beautiful?"

John looked shy suddenly, lowering his head, but replied with certainty: "Yes, beautiful."

"Hmm. Not as much as yours, though. You're a fucking angel."

"Well, your voice is sexy."

"Oh?" Alex said with a bright red blush. "And yours isn't?"

"Nope. Wasn't born that way."

"I beg a differ."

"Mm." John bit his lip and looked down at their sheet music. "Okay... Oh! I almost forgot about the choreography."

"Ooh!" Alex clapped his hands excitedly- totally to be overdramatic.

"Yeah, better learn that as soon as possible." John exhaled, revealing his struggle.

"You're gonna teach me how to dance?" Alex winked.

"Don't be so smug." John stood up with a teasing smile. "Let's see how much coordination you have."

"Ha." Alex took John's outstretched hands. "You guys do this stuff in South Carolina? Like, ballroom dancing?"

"Gosh, which time period are you living in?"

Alex laughed. "I guess I'm your Southern belle today."

"Mmm... what an interesting concept." John looked down at their feet, breath tickling Alex's cheek.

Alex stood on his tippy toes to appear taller. "I think I could be lovely if I tried."

"Like you need to try," John muttered, loud enough for Alex to hear and blushed yet again as John continued: "So, I'll step forward and you have to step backward, okay?"

"'Kay."

They did that thrice so the flow was easier, smiling at each other in both amusement and glee.

"Good. The rest is kind of tango styled, so I'll spin you a few times and then we'll hold hands at the waist while the other arm is outstretched, like so..." They modeled that. "Then, kick your leg up like this-"

"Will you dip me?"

John laughed. "If you'd like that."

"Yes, let's do it."

John blinked as if he didn't hear Alex correctly, but obeyed. "You trust me?"

"I won't let go, Jack."

John rolled his eyes. "Such a meme."

Alex smiled cheekily. "I know."

"But do you trust me?"

Alex nodded seriously. "Of course."

John dipped him, tenderly (read:  _alluringly_ ) sliding his hand over Alex's knee before holding Alex's lifted leg up for balance. "Like that?" he whispered.

Alex nodded dumbly, grin stretched wide. "This is fun."

"Well, we still have about an hour before we have to do homework, so let's go over the song again.” John shrugged. “Angelica will have the props ready tomorrow."

Alex took John's hand as they walked back over to the bed. The contact was so unnecessary but Alex truly didn't care. John will always be his, supportive and beautiful and kind... He could easily imagine the situation in a different context. But for now, he was satisfied with simply being with his greatest friend. _We're a team._ Alex wholeheartedly agreed.

* * *

 Alex and John practiced in the theatre room too, but they only had a full audience on Friday when Angelica called for a run through of all the performances. They had three days to practice and easily memorized the lyrics and most of the choreography, the only struggle being avoidance of stepping on each other's toes. ("I am quite out of practice..." "Could've fooled me, honestly.")

Right before their performance, John touched Alex's gently on the shoulder. "You good?"

"A little nervous," Alex admitted, bouncing on his feet.

"Hey, look at me." John tilted Alex's head towards him so their eyes met. "You've been doing amazing. Just bring that same youthful humor into the song, 'kay? Don't worry so much about the steps. Just roll with it, and keep your eyes focused on me. We can do this."

Alex nodded, leaning into John's warm palm. "Thank you," he said softly.

John's smile made all the fear worth it. Alex could gaze at John's face all day, counting all those glorious freckles...

"Alex, John," Angelica called. "You'll be on in five."

Alex took a deep breath. "Ready, partner?"

"If I didn't know any better I may have thought you were making fun of my accent," John said teasingly.

Alex stuck out his tongue childishly but continued to beam. They could do this.

Once they were called, John squeezed Alex's hand one last time and then they both got in position. As soon as the music started and John sang his first line, their audience of friends whistled approvingly and clapped in delight. They could appreciate a Broadway hit, that's for sure.

Laughter followed Alex's dreamy " _To write on_ ," and John's superior tone when he sang " _Baby, it's time to think_ " as he shoved Alex back in a sitting position on the bench they used as a prop. The extra movements and side comments made the whole bit amusing, and Alex sought comfort in the fact that everyone laughed- not at him, but the scene they wanted to convey. Hell, even Angelica (who may have scared him, just a little) swayed and smiled throughout their performance.

Alex was extra flirty as he tugged on John's hair during his " _You are seventeen- going on eighteen- and I'll depend on you_ ," before ruining it by saying "Psyche, bitch, I'm going to the club."

The dance number took place, then the very end.

...Or, they _thought_ it was the end.

Angelica clapped as the music stopped. "Way to bring a classic to life," she congratulated. Burr, holding a clipboard, also looked genuinely moved, which was odd for him.

"NOW KISS!" Peggy cried in the audience, as others chuckled and gasped at her boldness. John chuckled too, still holding Alex's hand as the latter turned red, trying to keep his expression neutral.

"I'm not joking," Peggy informed. "Rolf and Liesl kiss at the end, don't they?"

Angelica shrugged. "That would be a nice bonus, but-"

" _But_ , they're cute, and we have to be as extra as possible to make people like the show!"

Angelica frowned. "They don't have to."

"Let's Gen Z this bitch!" Peggy said enthusiastically.

While the sister's exchange happened, John's wide eyes scanned Alex for an answer. A _yes or no_ to _Um, should we?_

Alex's heart raced. He didn't want to disappoint... _anyone_. Not the audience because they didn't kiss, but definitely not John if the kiss wasn't good enough, or welcomed. In a panicked impulse, Alex lifted himself up higher and pressed his lips firmly against John. He heard John sigh in the back of his throat before kissing back, hands immediately straddling Alex's hips where he squeezed. God, they couldn't be subtle for shit.

Instead of pulling back, Alex deepened the kiss by tilting his head, and all the tension was released as his expression softened in bliss. He now stood at his normal height, letting John pull him closer to his chest as the latter's tongue slipped in hungrily. Alex definitely didn't pull back then, even in front of everyone. Neither Alex nor John even realized the cheers until they pulled away, panting.

"Well..." Angelica tried to search for her words.

"...Amazing performance," Aaron echoed. "Very real, convincing. And enjoyable to watch, honestly."

John blushed, stroking Alex's cheek, who immediately started apologizing with: "I- I'm sorry if-if-"

"Alex," John chuckled. "It's okay, you're okay, you did amazing-"

"W-Did I- was the kiss okay?" Alex mentally slapped himself for stuttering- or at least he would if that mattered to him instead of John's loving gaze.

"Aw, you're speechless," John gushed.

"I'm serious, John, I'm so sorry if-"

John pecked Alex on the cheek. "I love you. Calm down, sweetheart."

Alex let out an exhale, letting himself fall against John's chest. "God, I, uh, impulse?"

"It's okay. I enjoyed it."

Alex snapped his head up to face John. "Really?"

John nodded. "...I can't stay I didn't. I- you're a good kisser." 

"GET A ROOM!" Peggy yelled in joy.

Alex smiled, suddenly embarrassed. Of course. This is John. His partner, best friend, ride or die, _everything_. They were in this together. And John was obviously nervous, too. There was nothing to worry about.

John kissed his forehead. "I love you."

"I _want_ you." _Great. Yep. Not holding back, I guess._

"I want you, too."

"Then..." Alex paused. He had made up his mind. "Fuck it, you have me, then." He kissed John again, hands caressing his neck.

John smiled against his lips. "I'm yours."

Alex sent a thank you to the Heavens and to all of musical theatre that brought them together- as cliche as it sounds.

_We're meant to be. We're a team. We're sharing our problems and passions. This... this is one of them._

**Author's Note:**

> Originally going to be part of a prompt fanfic I failed to start. I actually posted this because I've been so unmotivated to write anything and this has been in my drafts. So have this <3
> 
> honestly theatre aus are my fave
> 
> queennyxie.tumblr.com Come scream at me xoxo
> 
> BASED ON THIS VIDEO (Broadway): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aQE2ycuoyM0 Adorable video!!! Watch to visualize exactly what these two dorks did. Plus you get a reallly nice gay kiss at the end so


End file.
